Today I read that superstar Usher received primary custody of his two sons with ex-wife Tameka Foster Raymond.

Was I surprised? No, not really!

Actually I’ve been following the case and kind of wished the judge would continue to allow joint custody between the two parents.

In a perfect world the two adults should have worked out their issues without a court of law. I thought after the death of Tameka’s son from her first marriage to Ryan Glover they would stop the custody case, *shrugs*.

I only know what I read on mainstream news sites and blogs (which I read for entertainment purposes only) I’m reading comments on social media sites (also for entertainment purposes) that Usher won because he has money. That statement alone bothers me.

I can remember going through a custody case with my mom and dad. My parents were never married, after they spilt up when I was about four or five mama and I moved back to her hometown of Alabama and daddy stayed in Detroit. I didn’t see my dad for one year straight. Shortly after daddy moved to Atlanta and I saw him often.

My mama soon got married and had other kids, my two brothers and two sisters, another sister came years later. No lie, times were very hard, things were out of control and I was growing up too fast, when all I wanted to do was be a child.

Long story short, my dad suggested to my mama numerous times that I should come live with him, she always said not right now. I can’t blame her; no mom really wants to be without all their kids. Eventually things got worse, and if anyone knew my dad he was the nicest man ever, but once he got fed up it was a wrap.

One day he got fed up and filed for custody. It wasn’t a long drawn out battle, we went to court the day after my 13^th birthday and that same day he was granted temporary custody. Six months later, he was granted full custody.Daddy and I with my first cousin/brother Mikal, Thanksgiving 92, my first in Atlanta

I was happy and sad at the same time. Happy for obvious reasons, but sad because my mama was hurt, I was leaving my sisters, who I had a close bond with, my school, friends and cousins, but it was for the best. No one believed my dad would win custody, he was single (with the exception of a long time girlfriend), he was in and out the hospital with Sickle Cell and he was a man. Daughters don’t live with daddies alone, but I did.

Nothing against my mom, but she needed to be forced to do what I’m sure she wanted to do, but just didn’t have the strength to do and that was give me a better life. Looking back, that decision saved our relationship. I grew and I learned to forgive.

There were lots of things I experienced that I only share when it can benefit others. I wasn’t sexually abused or physically abused for that matter, but the judge felt that I needed healing and removing me from that situation would do that.

I adore my mama and as I got older understood her more. I’m forever in debt to my father, may his soul rest in peace,  words cannot describe what he did for me.

Maybe one day Tameka can see that this decision was best for her kids, hopefully she will realize that when fathers fight for their kids, it really has nothing to do with the mother, but everything to do with his love for the child.

Usher and with sons Usher V and Naviyd